Baby E has now been with us for five days and we are loving every minute of it. Yes, we are sleep deprived and are having more "constructive" discussions than usual, but generally just.... happy... and fighting to get "Baby E time" :-) The H has two weeks paternity leave and then she is just mine... ha ha ha.
I had NO idea that I would be so utterly in love from the start. I thought it would take some time, as I have not been that interested in new born babies before, but baby E is very interactive, cuddly, cute and just the sweetest. Just lying with her on my chest is pure bliss... She is an angel and so far very easy to handle (knock on wood...). Breastfeeding is working just fine, and I am also healing psysically quite well. Went out for our first walk outside the house today for example and made it all the way to the pub down the river for lunch. So we are slowly slowly starting to withdraw our cocoon and enter the real world together.
Many many thanks for all the lovely messages, flowers and gifts from our friends and family around the world by the way! Baby E certainly feels very welcomed to this world outside my womb!
Saturday, August 30, 2008
04:26 August 25th 2008: Welcome Baby E!!
She is here!!! She is perfect!!! She is MINE!!! (oh, ok then the H, ours.... :-) She is baby E!!!
She almost made it on the due date (future project manager like mum?? :-) - only slipped into the next day by 4.5 hours. Mum and Dad are both over the moon and totally and utterly in love with our new person baby E who really really is the most beautiful baby in the world (apologies to all other cute babies but she beats all of you!!) and we could not be happier.
Whilst I can still remember it (the memories of the pain and trouble is fading rapidly...) below is our birth story for those of you that want to know.
Saturday 23rd of August: We managed to squeeze in the last NCT class in the morning and then had a chilled afternoon and evening. I wasn't feeling 100% and was having irregular cramps that I thought might be mild contractions, and exactly by 23.50 that evening, I was sure of having contractions, as they were then very regular..... what timing baby... starting 10 minutes before your due date!!
Sunday 24th of August: The H is being a top class birth partner setting us up with a bit of a "nest" in the living room with birth ball, duvets, DVD:s, snacks and lots of pillows. He also draws me a nice bath and we spend a couple of hours of contractions in there. They are bearable all through the night, quite mild and we are coping well. The H even has the late night DJ on XFM give us a cheer by sending in a message. The DJ wanted to know "what on earth the listeners were doing up this late" and the H sent in that we were in labour and "Heja Heja" :-)
Around 9 o'clock in the morning, I am having 3 or 4 contractions every 10 minutes so we call the birth centre and are asked to come in. They check me, and establish that I am 3 cm dialated, i.e in "Active Labour". The contractions are still fairly mild though, even though frequent so we are sent home to try and get some rest before the real trial. Back to the nest we watch some DVD:s and try and get some sleep and wait for the contractions to become unbearable. They slowly increase in strength and by 12.00 I am asking for some help coping. We go back to the hospital and get established in a room at the Birth Centre. Still only 3 cm dialated though..... The contractions are now very strong and the H is doing animalistic grunting noises with me and gas and air is introduced. Takes the edge off, but doesn't really do enough. By 16.00 I am exhausted, and only 4 cm dialated!!! The contractions have been regular all this time, and it feels like I am not getting any rest in between them. I ask the midwife for advice on how much longer it will take and this is like asking "how long is a piece of string" but I don't fancy my chances in coping for hours and hours on end without serious drugs, so ask to be moved to the labour ward and to have an Epidural.
We are moved one floor up to the labour ward and I get an epidural. Bliss. It doesn't actually work 100%, but maybe 70% of the pain is taken away, and combined with gas and air, I am in heaven in comparison. The anastetist is a bit concerned he is not able to take 100% away though and the midwifes are a bit worried as well, as the dialation is taking forever in spite of strong and regular contractions... They try with a 2nd epidural, and same result. They believe it is my scoliosis causing the anastetics not to flow as it should down my spine. Hours and hours pass like this, the midwifes are getting increasingly worried about the lack of dialation and wants to break my waters and put me on a special drug to get things moving, but don't want to do this without a fully working epidural as will increase contractions. In the end we do this anyways.
Monday 25th of August: By about 02.00 or so, the great news is announced that I AM 10 CM DIALATED and we can start the PUSH phase!! By this stage we were all convinced that it will be an emergency C section, as it is taking soooo long and the baby is getting distressed (there was some meconium in the water when they broke them, plus we are following the heartbeat), so this is great news. I am by this stage absolutely knackered though and concerned about being able to push. Need to find extra strength somewhere, and knowing we will soon meet our baby gives me plenty of that, however not quite enough, we very almost get there but need to have help with a ventouse in the end. This means I also have to have a small cut, which was my greatest fear going in but at this stage - I don't care one bit just as long as we can get a healthy baby OUT of there!!!!!
And we do!!! 04:26 baby E is out of the womb, and held up in front of me. She opens her dark blue eyes and locks them straight into mine... it is an absolutely magical moment and I am from this moment onwards totally and hopelessly in love. She is laid on my chest whilst the cord is clamped and cut and we are just looking at eachother. She then has to be taken away to get some oxygen and some tests and then she comes back to lie on my chest. Bliss!!! The 3rd stage with the placenta being delivered, there being some cafaffle about a potential piece of the placenta missing (there wasn't in the end) and me being stiched up, passes as in a deep deep surreal sleep, I can only see baby E and the amazing H, and the rest seems very very far away....
Welcome my darling!! You were definately worth the 28.5 hours of labour!!!
PS: She was 3744 grams or 8.2 pounds big, and 52 cm long
She almost made it on the due date (future project manager like mum?? :-) - only slipped into the next day by 4.5 hours. Mum and Dad are both over the moon and totally and utterly in love with our new person baby E who really really is the most beautiful baby in the world (apologies to all other cute babies but she beats all of you!!) and we could not be happier.
Whilst I can still remember it (the memories of the pain and trouble is fading rapidly...) below is our birth story for those of you that want to know.
Saturday 23rd of August: We managed to squeeze in the last NCT class in the morning and then had a chilled afternoon and evening. I wasn't feeling 100% and was having irregular cramps that I thought might be mild contractions, and exactly by 23.50 that evening, I was sure of having contractions, as they were then very regular..... what timing baby... starting 10 minutes before your due date!!
Sunday 24th of August: The H is being a top class birth partner setting us up with a bit of a "nest" in the living room with birth ball, duvets, DVD:s, snacks and lots of pillows. He also draws me a nice bath and we spend a couple of hours of contractions in there. They are bearable all through the night, quite mild and we are coping well. The H even has the late night DJ on XFM give us a cheer by sending in a message. The DJ wanted to know "what on earth the listeners were doing up this late" and the H sent in that we were in labour and "Heja Heja" :-)
Around 9 o'clock in the morning, I am having 3 or 4 contractions every 10 minutes so we call the birth centre and are asked to come in. They check me, and establish that I am 3 cm dialated, i.e in "Active Labour". The contractions are still fairly mild though, even though frequent so we are sent home to try and get some rest before the real trial. Back to the nest we watch some DVD:s and try and get some sleep and wait for the contractions to become unbearable. They slowly increase in strength and by 12.00 I am asking for some help coping. We go back to the hospital and get established in a room at the Birth Centre. Still only 3 cm dialated though..... The contractions are now very strong and the H is doing animalistic grunting noises with me and gas and air is introduced. Takes the edge off, but doesn't really do enough. By 16.00 I am exhausted, and only 4 cm dialated!!! The contractions have been regular all this time, and it feels like I am not getting any rest in between them. I ask the midwife for advice on how much longer it will take and this is like asking "how long is a piece of string" but I don't fancy my chances in coping for hours and hours on end without serious drugs, so ask to be moved to the labour ward and to have an Epidural.
We are moved one floor up to the labour ward and I get an epidural. Bliss. It doesn't actually work 100%, but maybe 70% of the pain is taken away, and combined with gas and air, I am in heaven in comparison. The anastetist is a bit concerned he is not able to take 100% away though and the midwifes are a bit worried as well, as the dialation is taking forever in spite of strong and regular contractions... They try with a 2nd epidural, and same result. They believe it is my scoliosis causing the anastetics not to flow as it should down my spine. Hours and hours pass like this, the midwifes are getting increasingly worried about the lack of dialation and wants to break my waters and put me on a special drug to get things moving, but don't want to do this without a fully working epidural as will increase contractions. In the end we do this anyways.
Monday 25th of August: By about 02.00 or so, the great news is announced that I AM 10 CM DIALATED and we can start the PUSH phase!! By this stage we were all convinced that it will be an emergency C section, as it is taking soooo long and the baby is getting distressed (there was some meconium in the water when they broke them, plus we are following the heartbeat), so this is great news. I am by this stage absolutely knackered though and concerned about being able to push. Need to find extra strength somewhere, and knowing we will soon meet our baby gives me plenty of that, however not quite enough, we very almost get there but need to have help with a ventouse in the end. This means I also have to have a small cut, which was my greatest fear going in but at this stage - I don't care one bit just as long as we can get a healthy baby OUT of there!!!!!
And we do!!! 04:26 baby E is out of the womb, and held up in front of me. She opens her dark blue eyes and locks them straight into mine... it is an absolutely magical moment and I am from this moment onwards totally and hopelessly in love. She is laid on my chest whilst the cord is clamped and cut and we are just looking at eachother. She then has to be taken away to get some oxygen and some tests and then she comes back to lie on my chest. Bliss!!! The 3rd stage with the placenta being delivered, there being some cafaffle about a potential piece of the placenta missing (there wasn't in the end) and me being stiched up, passes as in a deep deep surreal sleep, I can only see baby E and the amazing H, and the rest seems very very far away....
Welcome my darling!! You were definately worth the 28.5 hours of labour!!!
PS: She was 3744 grams or 8.2 pounds big, and 52 cm long
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Let the SHOW begin!
Today is officially my first day of Maternity leave. Have been on holiday the previous 2.5 weeks. So, where is this baby I am supposted to be off taking care off? You can come out now! We are ready! (we think...)
Had the "show" yesterday, not that it means anything really as can still take days/weeks, but still... yet another sign in the right direction...
Exciting days!
Had the "show" yesterday, not that it means anything really as can still take days/weeks, but still... yet another sign in the right direction...
Exciting days!
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
What is it about white vans?
Was cut off earlier today by a man in a white van, who looked just as rough, rude and ugly as I have gotten used to drivers of white vans to look in this country. Why is that though? Is there a special test you have to take when you buy a white van? A test where you only pass if you are look like a fat, "sailor tatooed", tooth-less, discusting man - and you can proove to have the foulest vocabulary and manners around!??
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Week 39: Yes I KNOW I am not the first woman giving birth....
Have to share some frustration with this one saying that everyone around me seems to think is comforting right now:
"Well, just think that you are not exactly the first woman to give birth"
alternatively:
"It's the most natural process in the world"
F*** Off!!!!!
It is the FIRST time for me and I don't want to feel like a failure/strange/unusual if I am struggling to cope with it. There.
On the other hand - I do take comfort in the thoughts of labour, however painful, is a natural process and will have an end - hopefully a very Happy End as well (not like other pain where you don't know where it is coming from and/or will end which will enhance the fear factor) I just don't want to have to feel like I am a failure if I don't cope well with the whole process once it starts..............
"Well, just think that you are not exactly the first woman to give birth"
alternatively:
"It's the most natural process in the world"
F*** Off!!!!!
It is the FIRST time for me and I don't want to feel like a failure/strange/unusual if I am struggling to cope with it. There.
On the other hand - I do take comfort in the thoughts of labour, however painful, is a natural process and will have an end - hopefully a very Happy End as well (not like other pain where you don't know where it is coming from and/or will end which will enhance the fear factor) I just don't want to have to feel like I am a failure if I don't cope well with the whole process once it starts..............
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Top 10 of what I want to do when not pregnant anymore...
Generally still enjoying being off work and usually able to get quite a lot done in a day but today I am very tired and lethargic and haven't been able to get myself out of the house, which immediately results in feeling a bit bored and lonely as a consequence...
So, amusing myself with thinking of what I want to do most when not pregnant anymore:
1. Get to know this new little person inside me finally, and see what s/he looks and is like...
2. Skiing.... off piste.... in the alps.... am looking at some nice options with nanny services (a bit early but hey!) for the 2nd week in March (week 11) - who wants to join us???
3. Diving.... we are seriously craving a "real" holiday, so in addition to skiing the H is looking at diving alternatives to Egypt where we can bring the in-laws who have offered to help with some baby sitting whilst we are under water :-)
4. Running and other fun, vigurous exercise... Body Combat, Dance classes, stuff that takes your breath away and involves a lot of jumping around.... London Triathlon August 09 anyone?
5. Going out with the H and friends for a fun, carefree night out with lots of drinking and silly dancing....
6. Just going out for a nice meal with a fair amount of good wine.... and cheese board... and seafood...
7. Having the energy to do all of the above, and not falling asleep at 22.00 at night...
8. Travelling to new, exciting places
9. Sleeping on my stomache....
10. Not having a squeezed bladder, heartburn and cramped lungs
I will miss the movements and kicks in the bump though... that's for sure.
So, amusing myself with thinking of what I want to do most when not pregnant anymore:
1. Get to know this new little person inside me finally, and see what s/he looks and is like...
2. Skiing.... off piste.... in the alps.... am looking at some nice options with nanny services (a bit early but hey!) for the 2nd week in March (week 11) - who wants to join us???
3. Diving.... we are seriously craving a "real" holiday, so in addition to skiing the H is looking at diving alternatives to Egypt where we can bring the in-laws who have offered to help with some baby sitting whilst we are under water :-)
4. Running and other fun, vigurous exercise... Body Combat, Dance classes, stuff that takes your breath away and involves a lot of jumping around.... London Triathlon August 09 anyone?
5. Going out with the H and friends for a fun, carefree night out with lots of drinking and silly dancing....
6. Just going out for a nice meal with a fair amount of good wine.... and cheese board... and seafood...
7. Having the energy to do all of the above, and not falling asleep at 22.00 at night...
8. Travelling to new, exciting places
9. Sleeping on my stomache....
10. Not having a squeezed bladder, heartburn and cramped lungs
I will miss the movements and kicks in the bump though... that's for sure.
Monday, August 11, 2008
Week 38: Betting on date and sex...
Exciting days... the baby can come out any day now and s/he wouldn't be premature anymore. That's a nice feeling!
However, my bet would be slightly late - to be exact the 27th of August. I am also convinced it's a baby boy. The General is also convinced it's a boy...
The H is convinced it's a girl, as is BB a.k.a Superdoula....
Only the baby knows though.... to be continued....
PS: FYI: The formal EDD (expected delivery date) is the 24th of August.
However, my bet would be slightly late - to be exact the 27th of August. I am also convinced it's a baby boy. The General is also convinced it's a boy...
The H is convinced it's a girl, as is BB a.k.a Superdoula....
Only the baby knows though.... to be continued....
PS: FYI: The formal EDD (expected delivery date) is the 24th of August.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Mamma Mia!
Confession time. First confession: I am officially naff. I wanted to kill some time today in the rain and went to the cinema. Only film on matinee that was even remotely of interest to me, was Mamma Mia, so I went along with it. It is just as cheesy as the musical and the trailers promise but quite funny to watch Colin, Stellan and Pierce strut their stuff to Abba music...
The 2nd confession is that when there was a particularly cheesy scene when everyone on this happy island are dancing to Dancing Queen, and a cameo snapshot of Benny from Abba playing the piano trying to look greek... and the sailing ship with the Swedish flag that got the Stellan character to the island are all in one picture.... I start crying. And laughing at the same time. Even though the whole thing is set in Greece, and only one of the actors are Swedish, I got a very nostalgic, sentimental and emotional longing for everything Swedish, combined with a sense of pride that these very famous actors were being silly to the music of my motherland, the music I grew up with and kept miming to as a 4-7 year old.... using a hair brush for a microphone.... Then I couldn't stop. There were floods of tears running down my cheeks for the rest of the film, mixed with giggling at myself... I wasn't really feeling miserable... just emotional... also about raising a child in a foreign country with a lot of weird traditions and stuff I just don't "get"... Oh Dear, and I don't even like Abba music that much..... (anymore that is, loved it as a small child with the hairbrush in hand....)
Mamma Mia.... here I go again... my my
Monday, August 4, 2008
Week 37: Breeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeathe!!!!!
My bump "dropped" end of last week and I can breeeeeeeeeeeeeathe again!!! I can also eat normal portions of food again!!! It is easier to live all of a sudden. Baby not engaged yet though, so still some time to enjoy being a "lady of leisure" (in theory anyways). 2nd day off today, and so far I am loving it. Cleaned out our office on friday and thinking about giving the garden a good go (with gloves of course so to not expose myself to cats droppings etc other dangerous stuff for pregnant people) today. Nesting....
Anyways, had forgotten how nice it is to be able to breathe properly! :-) Must be a downside... oh yeah... off to the loo again I go...........
Anyways, had forgotten how nice it is to be able to breathe properly! :-) Must be a downside... oh yeah... off to the loo again I go...........
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