The H and I went to a parental information session yesterday, which was mainly about the different stages of labour and pain relief. The men and the women were separated at one point and we, the women, had to write down on a clip board what we expect from our husbands when going through labour, and they, the men, had to write down what they thought we would expect. Turned out to be pretty consistent across the two groups, which is good I guess.
We ended up having a bit of a discussion in the womens group about drugs though (having slightly misunderstood the task at the beginning). In a group of about 10 women, about 8 were very vocal about "as many drugs as possible, as quickly as possible", one was very clear about wishing to do as natural birth as possible, and I was the only one in the middle "it depends how I feel, and how long it goes on for..." (typical Swedish "in the middle" approach!?). All of these mothers are first timers, so I was surprised that they seemed to be so sure about this. Will be interesting to hear what actually happend if I do meet up with either of them for one of the many "post natal coffees" on offer in the area (doesn't sound to social does it, "post-natal"... why not call it "new mums" or something a bit more human??).
Anyways... what I want from the H is the following, I think....
1. Distraction - help me think about other things
2. Massage and hair stroking (NO kisses on the forehead!!)
3. Calming, reassuring, telling me what is going on
4. Knowing our birth plan at heart and being able to interpret between me and the midwifes and if needed make appropriate decisions for us if I am not able to
5. Distraction....
6. Massage....
7. Distraction....
8. Massage....
9. Distraction....
10. Massage....
etc etc etc
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2 comments:
Wise to keep an open mind!
I reckon the fear factor is the big one to beat when giving birth. So yes, calming massages, words, guidance, all good! Distraction didn't work for me - I found concentration did.
Most of all, I was surprised. Surprised that it was such hard work. Surprised that while the pain was there, it wasn't that bad...
Now there is one you don't hear so often when it comes to child birth. It is oh so personal and I would have definitely opted for drugs if I needed to.
Then the little one comes out and it doesn't matter much how you got there. Keep your eye on the ball....
Thank you my dear friend - top advice. The only thing I know for sure is that it's very individual as everyone I've asked has very different experiences, and that you need to keep an open mind.
Eye on the ball it is. Speaking of balls... so glad that Spain won yesterday btw... our joint efforts to cheer for the loosing team this time seems to have worked :-)
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